Tuesday, February 28, 2006

No Quarter (Part II)

So with all the change laying around (it has been a while since I last was able to make a Friday Night Poker Game), I’ve been looking at the collectible quarters, rating them from Way Cool to Pretty Lame. Needless to say, there are a lot of pretty lame ones.

Here’s the class of 2000:

OK, here we unite the concept of showing your state outline with a product placement for Sentry Insurance. I’m going easy on this one, because unlike the other disasters on the backs of our state quarters that look like they were put together by sixth and seventh graders, this one WAS put together by sixth and seventh graders.

Rating: C= Still Lame, though.

Another good coin with nice feel to it – the open space above the dome calls attention to itself much like syncopations in a jazz riff. Of course, the image is forgettable (it is the Maryland state house – it only looks like a Turkish Pagoda). The words (which are supposed to read “The Old Line State”, not “The Line Old State”) is in reference to the Maryland troops ability to pick up chicks (“Well, yes, I am married, but my wife’s a Tory”).

Rating: B= Not Bad

South Carolina
Another blender of a coin with the outline, the state bird, the state tree, the state flower, and the answer to the state high school examination final (“Spell Palmetto. Palmetto”). You can just imagine the discussion over this one – Look, we voted in all the lame icons, we might as well USE them.

Rating: D = Real Lame

New Hampshire
Probably one of the more wordy coins to show up in a while - state name, E Puribus, State Motto (which is an ACTUAL SENTENCE as opposed to three random words), and a label for the odd shape on the coin – the scenic Old Man on the Mountain.

Shortly after this coin came out, the Old Man succumbed to the forces of erosion and collapsed. This caused a sudden outbreak of “The Curse of the Quarters” which is covered here by CNN. Yeah, they are really, really, REALLY reaching on this. I mean, these quarters are a curse by themselves.

Rating: B= Not Bad, but only out of respect for dead geological features.

So here we have a moment of history collapsed, when Columbus’s ships arrived in the New World. No, that’s not right, these are the Susan Constant, Godspeed, and Discovery that brought the first settlers to Jamestown. These ships are forgotten by the rest of the nation, except for the one that is currently in orbit of Jupiter after HAL went crazy and killed everyone except Bowman.

Actually, not ones to miss an opportunity, the Virginia coin celebrates the 400th year anniversary of Jamestown . . . which is still a year away from now. But after this coin, they may not give them another chance.

Rating: C = Kinda Lame.

And that is for another year. And a happy birthday to the Monkey King, who got me started on this by ragging on the West Virginia quarter.

More later,